8 Things that ruin your relationship

Keep your relationship healthy. Of course, we all try to do this, but some of the following may appear familiar.

Luckily, there is not yet a man overboard, but deal with it as soon as you can! 

Criticizing family or friends
No matter what you think of his/her family, don’t ever pick on them. Even if your partner dislikes his/her family, it still isn’t okay for others to be mean, just think how you would feel in the same case. If they are treating you in a bad way tell your partner you are not comfortable with them, maybe you can work it out together.
Besides his family his friends may be even more important, at last, those are the ones he has chosen.


‘Stalking’
Trust your partner. If you can’t trust your SO you could probably better break up now. In case you suspect an (online) affair, check here for the signs. If you do trust your partner you don’t need to keep an eye on them at all times. Reading your SO’s text messages is invasion of his/her privacy, constantly asking where he/she is and what he/she is doing is shit annoying for him/her, for you, so cut it out! Think how you feel if your mom constantly asks you where you are.. Give each other space.

Fighting in public
It is normal to have a discussion once in a while, specially if you have been together for some time form which you are spending most of it together, but fighting in public is a no-go. Easiest way to avoid this is not confronting your SO with something in public, but if you notice your partner is about to start it just take a deep breathe and walk away. Go to the bathroom and write you thoughts in you phone, this way you can blow of some steam. If it keeps bothering you, talk about it with him/her at night.
This also applies for social media. your 367 friends don’t need to know that your #stupidboyfriend forgot about your #birthday of leaves his #socks #everywhere #on #the #floor. I mean, how would you feel it he tweeted about how it is #thattimeofthemonth again and you’re acting like a total #bitch?  Chill down, have a #Snickers.

Changing your SO
Don’t try to change your SO. See your boyfriend as a dog, of course you can teach him some tricks, but don’t think you can turn a bulldog into a poodle. The only exception is when he/she asked you for it, but keep in mind, you are his/her partner, not therapist. In case your SO really wants to change something in his/her life, support him/her and make an appointment to see his/her GP (together).

Acting as if there are no problems
Yes, it is important not to make a big deal out of everything, but acting like there is nothing wrong is also not smart. If there is something really bothering you, you should be able to talk about this and solve it (together). So TALK about it, no fighting, communication is key! Keep it close to yourself, tell what you noticed and how it makes you feel.

Lying
Lying is one of the dumbest things you can do in a relationship. If you get caught on one lie, your whole trust is gone in a sec. And come on, do you want your SO to lie to you? Remember the golden rule: Treat others as you want to be treated by them. But beyond that, if you have to lie to your partner, there is probably something quite wrong. Go after that yourself and maybe you’ll find out that you are still trying to stay together for the wrong reasons or because of the right ones but with the wrong person;)


Fighting about money
If you are about to live together, money is one of the biggest issues that causes fights, specially if you don’t have that much. Make clear agreements about money to prevent fights. Having a household pot is always a smart move, in that way you can keep your own pot aswell, just as your SO. Expenses done with your own money, and which do not influence the shared pot, don’t need explanation.

Prohibiting stuff
Forbid eachother nothing. Cheating is (for most) something that you don’t need to forbid since it is an unspoken rule, same as respecting each others privacy. Don’t you want her chatting with her girls all the time? Don’t you want him to get home drunk every weekend? Thats understandable, but talk about it, and maybe if he/she doesn’t want to change he/she might not be the one.

Relationship ruined? Get your ex back

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