15 Things you shouldn’t do for your SO

Afb: Scientias

Nothing beats being in love – but that doesn’t mean you should forget about your own limits. Wheter you together for years and years, or just started dating, there are a few thing you shouldn’t do for your SO.

Let starts the new year with some good resolutions to take better care of yourself, even in love!

1. Forgetting about yourself
In a relationship, it is necessary to compromise – but compromises must come from both sides! If you’re always the one who has set a step back and need to adjust yourself to the other, something is quite wrong in your relationship. If you only think of the happiness and pleasure of others, you forget yourself and you will slowly lose your identity.
In addition, your partner loses interest in you because you are not the person whom he / she fell in love with.

2. Keeping silent
Keeping silent to avoid arguments is not the solution. Bottleling up everything just gives you a bad feeling and is not a good basis for a strong relationship. Communication is key!

3. Forgiving every mistake
Forgiveness is a virtue, but that does not mean you should just put up with everything because you have got a good heart. After a while you yourself will start making up excuses for her / his behavior. That’s no good!

4. Accepting jealousy
A jealous partner puts a heavy strain on your relationship and your confidence. When your partner is extremely jealous, he or she will check you constantly and create a negative climate. Enough is enough!

5. Sacrificing your dreams
It is impossible to love someone who does not support your dreams and passions. No love is important enough to push yourself aside, and no real love would ever ask this from you.

6. Accepting lies 
Lying within a relationship is not done. One should never bury his head in the sand and minimize the lies of his / her partner to keep the peace.

7. Changing your principles
When your partner is trying to change your values, or ridicules your principles, there should sound an alarm in your head. That is not okay! In a relationship you have to be willing to respect the values of the other, and if you cannot, it means that you two are not made for each other.

8. Changing your looks
Would you like to lose some weight to feel better about yourself? No problem! But if you just do this in order to please your partner or to win the affection of someone, it can be dangerous! Is it really worth it to change yourself? And is he or she’s really in love with you or just thinking about their appearance with you on their side? Those are things to think hard about it.

9. Misrepresenting yourself
It’s always good to keep developing yourself, but if you only try to change who you are to please another, it can be very unhealthy. If the other is ashamed for who you really are, it’s his/her problem. As long as you are happy with yourself, you should never let anyone tell you to change. Stay true to yourself!

10. Neglecting your friends
Does your partner hinder you in seeing your friends? Does he/she think your friends have a bad influence on you? Worse, he/she even forbids you to see them? Wrong lot! In this way, they’re probably trying to apply insulation for better control. See your friends on a regular basis in order not to lose them

11. Leaving your family
Same as 10, only not within your family.

12. letting your SO control you
If your partner is constantly telling you what to do, what to wear, where to go, and controlling every step you take, you should be alarmed. Specially when they even start checking your phones/e-mails or bags I really advice you to get the hell out of there!

13. Keeping you away from things
If your SO expects you to stop doing whatever little things you like to do, f.e. from going shopping all day with your friends to eating potato chips, without a proper reason we are still talking about controlling behavior. He/she should mind his/her own business!

14. Deciding about your desire to have kids
So she wants to have kids, he doesn’t. So you forget about your life long dream of becoming a mom (NO! accidents don’t happen anymore, so don’t even think about getting pregnant by accident). Or maybe it’s the other way around, he wants to have kids, but you’re not really into it. So you get them just to please him.. Both scenarios are not common in a healthy relationship.

15. Lowering your expectations
Nobody should settle for less, only out of fear to never find the right person for you!

Do you have experience and want to share it? Or did I forgot anything?
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